Rest, Reflect, Recharge: Choosing Self-Compassion in Parenting
Last week was intense. The kids were loud and demanding, with a packed schedule of activities, meetings, and playdates.
I’d been busy growing my coaching practice, and housework took a back seat, adding to the mental load.
The weekend was just as hectic.
After a busy Saturday, we finally sat down to relax in the evening, when the neighbours popped by with belated Christmas gifts. Instead of unwinding, I found myself hosting.
Exhausted, I went to bed early.
The next morning, I made a choice: I wouldn’t join the family at my in-laws. I needed time at home to prep for the week ahead and recharge my batteries.
That’s when my inner critic showed up. It whispered ...
"You should go. Make the effort for your family. You’ll miss out on time with your kids. Staying home is selfish. You'll cope."
The guilt hit.
I could feel the pull to give in, but rather than letting the guilt influence me, I stopped and listened to its narrative. Then asked myself some important questions:
➤ Where is this narrative coming from?
➤ Is it true?
➤ Is it helping me or just piling on unnecessary pressure?
As I considered these questions, I realised the narrative wasn’t based on truth but on subconscious, well-rehearsed patterns. It wasn’t helpful, and it certainly wasn’t serving me.
So, I reframed it:
"Taking time for myself isn’t selfish - it’s necessary. Resting and recharging will allow me to show up as a calmer, more patient parent. My kids will benefit more from a balanced, present version of me later than from an exhausted one now."
Everything became clearer. The guilt began to fade, and I felt more confident in my choice to honour my needs.
This was self-compassion in action:
👉 Acknowledging my needs - I recognised my exhaustion and allowed myself to rest.
👉 Pausing and reflecting - I listened to my inner voice and challenged its narrative.
👉 Reframing with compassion - I replaced criticism with truth, kindness, and self-acceptance.
It’s a simple process but a powerful one.
By showing myself compassion, I allowed myself to be comfortable with my decision.
Taking time out wasn’t neglecting my family – it was setting myself up to be a better parent for them later.
When they get home tired and hungry, I’ll be rested, patient, and present.
I’ll be able to communicate with them calmly and lovingly, instead of showing up exhausted and irritable.
The reality is that we ALL need time to recharge.
Choosing self-compassion isn’t always easy, especially when the inner critic tries to take over. But it’s a skill worth practicing.
Because when we take care of ourselves, we can take better care of those we love.
If this resonates with you and you’d like support in learning to reflect on your inner dialogue and embrace self-compassion, get in touch today. I’d love to guide you on this journey.
